“So here I am up on Bainbridge Avenue
Still in one piece but glad I’m alive”
- “Funky Céilí,” Black 47
In many ways, Norwood is like any other neighborhood in the Bronx. People don’t clean up after their dogs and the cracked sidewalks are lined with unhealthy-looking ginkgos and honeylocust trees. The buildings are all dingy and beige, yet, they still manage to retain that tarnished elegance of the pre-war Art Deco.
Throughout its history, Norwood has been a neighborhood of immigrants, and it’s fitting that many of its streets are named for foreign heroes of the American Revolution. In the years before World War II, Jewish and Irish immigrants who had somehow scraped together enough to move out of the Manhattan tenements populated the area. The post-war boom sparked a suburban exodus, and waves of Puerto Ricans and blacks, then Dominicans and Eastern Europeans, and so on. So much of the Bronx followed (continues to follow) this demographic model of transition.
Via their meaningless slogan (“A Revelation in Every Cup”) Green Mountain Coffee invites you, the customer, to share your own “revelation” on the appropriately named website mycoffeerevelation.com. They are absolutely profound in their simplicity, and I’ve included some of my favorites below:
“I realized the perfect cup of coffee can change your whole day!” - Melissa, Barberton, OH
As can antidepressants.
“I realized cooler weather is another of my excuses for sipping a cup of coffee.” - Mary, Duxbury, VT
You’re an adult, Mary, you don’t need an “excuse” to drink coffee.
“I realized coffee awakens my body, tantalizes my heart, and entices my soul.” - Matt, Macungie, PA
Excellent use of verbs, Matt.
“I realized my heart belongs to Vermont. My address, unfortunately, no longer does; but every morning I go there in my mind, through my cup. :)” - Sarah Grace, Lodi, NJ
Fair enough, Sarah Grace, but I would be more concerned with the fact that your husband is spiking your coffee with hallucinogenic drugs every morning.
“I realized coffee carries the day, the way that music carries poetry.” - Henry, Dandridge, TN
Henry’s eighth grade English teacher just spent an entire class on metaphors.
“I realized a fragrant cup of coffee equals a rendez-vous with myself.” - Mary Anne, Brooklyn, NY
“I realized that I’m grouchy without my Green Mountain coffee in the morning. Seriously.” - Mary, Fort Wayne, IN
Chill the fuck out, Mary, I believe you.
“I realized that I am a big time coffee lover and that it is one of my addictions that I am truly proud to say is not that bad. I am ” [sic] - Giovanna, Jacksonville, FL
Giovanna passed out mid-sentence and was rushed to the nearest hospital. She is currently in rehab and reportedly making great progress.
“I realized the coffee is great but fear of this recession is real.” - Hyacinth, Hartford, CT
It’s always important to keep your feet on the ground, even when drinking great coffee.
“I realized that all work and no play makes me a dull guy.” - Jalaj, Westboro, MA
Bellowed Jalaj as he doused his co-worker in gasoline.
“I realized I need a Break.” - Sheetal, Westboro, MA
You and me both.
The following op-ed was originally published on SkidmoreUnofficial.com.
Ed. Note – I would assume that a headline about “rape” is probably sufficient, but I’ve been advised to include a “Trigger Warning” anyway.
There have been a few developments in the the ongoing scandal over the Saratoga Springs Police Department’s huge mishandling of the September 1 rape investigation. Last Friday, Lucian McCarty wrote a post on his City Desk blog at The Saratogian calling attention to comments made byPublic Safety Commissioner Christian Mathiesen, the city official who—along with Police Chief Chris Cole—made the final decision to withhold virtually all information related to the rape for over a month. Mathiesen has repeatedly engaged in shameless victim-blaming in an attempt to skirt responsibility, saying (once again) that “walking alone on a street at that time of night may not be advisable for a woman who is alone.”
Now, I’m all for common sense, but the irony of the Public Safety Commissioner telling the women of Saratoga Springs to take their lives and well-beings into their own hands is just a little too much to bear. The attitude is, essentially, “we can never, ever stop rape, so the only realistic thing to do is place the full burden of responsibility on you.”
Sage wisdom, ladies. You’d better padlock your door and crawl under the bed, because the Saratoga cops are too busy beating the shit out of random strangers in bar fights on Caroline Street to do their jobs and protect you.Read more
The following op-ed was originally published on SkidmoreUnofficial.com.
So, a brief summary of the Middlebury debacle, starting from the beginning…on October 12, in preparation for a visit from the Dalai Lama, a group of five Middlebury students from the self-proclaimed “Dalai Lama Welcoming Committee” (DLWC) authored a fake press release and sent it to hundreds of students, faculty members, and members of the local press via email. The release (titled “Middlebury College Divests from War in Honor of Dalai Lama Visit”) averred to be from the College’s “Office of Communications.”
Several days later, on October 16, the DLWC “came clean” in another campus-wide letter, outing themselves and stating their objectives. According to an article in the student newspaper, The Middlebury Campus, the DLWC called for “greater endowment transparency and urged the College to divest from arms manufacturers, military contractors and fossil fuel companies.” They went on to argue against Middlebury’s opaque investment structure, calling it “inconsistent with the College’s values and mission statement.”*
As one might expect, the five members of the DLWC were charged with violating provisions of the College Handbook, and were tried on November 1 in a marathon, six-hour public judicial hearing, complete with statements, witness testimony, character references, and multiple hours of deliberation (the first of its kind in over five years, apparently).Read more
As any observer of American political discourse knows, Fox Nation is an island of rational thought in the choppy sea of the Lamestream Media. Here’s a very brief sampling of some of the more thought provoking comments in response to Mitt Romney’s defeat:
COMMUNIST NEWS NETWORK DOES IT AGAIN helpe a socilist stay in office!! Now WE have a LAMEDUCK PRESIDENT IN OFFICE status quo! Bohner said if OBAMA does not agree with the house values he can kiss getting anything thru the house! It seems we are statue quo!!! thanks to all the socilist who want freebees from the government!
WHY DON’T ALL YOU LEFTISTS MOVE TO CUBA SINCE YOU THINK SOCIALISM IS SO WONDERFUL
The Obama’s are like a couple of ill-bred ghettø kids who just won the lottery. Spendthrift, vulgar, irresponsible, and utterly filled with arrogant delusions of their own self-importance.
Great. Four more years of multitrillion dollar Chinese loans, higher healthcare costs, higher taxes, higher gas prices, fewer freedoms, cowardly leadership, and lice-infested monkey fur pie
LIBER_TURDS, THE PARTY OF COONS AND PANTHERS,
HOW IS COONOMICS WORKING WHERE U LIVE KID?
When I was around three or four, I remember sitting on the carpet of my living room, transfixed by a snowy tape of Star Wars: A New Hope. There was one scene, of course, that has stuck with me ever since, and I don’t think I’ll be able to forget it, even if I never watch the movie again for the rest of my life.
After palling around with Obi-Wan for a little while, Luke races home to discover his uncle and aunt’s moisture farm billowing thick, black smoke and burning to the ground. He stands there, surveying the end of his life of Tatooine, and there was a brief moment—a slow shot of a pair of charred human skeletons and windswept Luke’s quick glance to the ground—when I realized that Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru didn’t exist anymore. As far as I can tell, this was my first exposure to the concept of death.
So yes, like a million other people my age Star Wars was a formative aspect of my childhood, and I continue to have a throbbing, unabashed love for the original trilogy. That’s why this week’s big news of the Lucasfilm-Disney merger (and the impending production of Star Wars Episode VII) left me angry and frustrated.
I was the kind of person who had such high hopes for The Phantom Menace, stewed in confusion as I watched it, left the theater convinced that that it wasn’t the worst movie ever made, and then—years later—finally accepted that it was, in fact, the worst movie ever made. Thus, it’s really hard to muster up any excitement for what’s to come. Over the last decade, my whole attitude of “How can they possibly screw it up?” has migrated to the opposite end of the spectrum: “How can they possibly not screw it up?”
So with that, I humbly submit several suggestions that I think will keep Star Wars Episode VII from falling into the toilet bowl of movie history.Read more
Propaganda promoting German-American association, which peaked on May 17, 1934, when 50.000 people gathered in Madison Square Garden, New York , to confirm the relationship between the United States and Nazi Germany.
Sorry to be a nitpicky schmuck, but this rally was actually staged by the Friends of New Germany, not the “German-American association.” You may be thinking of the FNG’s successor, the German-American Bund (“Bund” roughly means “association”) who held a different, much more well-known pro-Nazi rally at Madison Square Garden on February 20, 1939.
Say what you will about the Hasidim, but you have to admire their commitment to the Andalusian hat industry.
The New York Times: Keeping elegance alive in the 21st century